NFNS: We Have a Winner!

July 27, 2008 at 1:47 am 5 comments

Okay, so who won isn’t the news going into tonight’s finale.  Unless, the leak was a hoax or they re-taped the ending pretty much everyone knows that Aaron wins, but no one knows why.  Did he win any competitions?  I don’t think so.  He survived through attrition.  Other, more qualified candidates were booted for conjured reasons.  Shane: we know we criticized you in the beginning for acting too mature for your age but you’re too young.  Yeah I get that one, panel – no one ever wants to watch a show about a child prodigy, right Doogie Houser?  Plus it isn’t like someone dropping two and a half boy-band members in just three years isn’t inspiring and worthy of a long career is it Jared Fogel?

I’m sorry, Kelsey, but between your gorgeous smile, fantastic food knowledge, unbelievable energy, genuine passion, and the fact that you have won more challenges than all of the others combined we just can’t see you as a food expert.  What was that?  Sunny Anderson is a DJ and Sandra Lee doesn’t actually cook; she reheats?  Their different, you’re just too young.  What?  Mary Nolan is 26?  Well, uh, er, hmm, oh yeah, those extra few months of life are very important – you’ll see.

Of course Nolan is the real winner of Next Food Network Star.  She got her show and didn’t even have to compete.  I wonder if she had been in the final three in place of Lisa Garza if her promo would have seen her dangling from a string 30 feet off the ground.  I think not.  I still maintain that Lisa’s promo challenge last week was designed specifically to cut her out, but yet she won the final challenge in impressive style while Aaron bombed like nothing we have ever seen before.  Adam copped out with his smoked meat buffet, and a monotone soliloquy worthy of an Obama campaign speech.

There just wasn’t much talent this year.  There was Cory the comedian who wasn’t funny.  Kevin who re-defined jerk.  Jeffery who wasn’t memorable in any way, Nipa who was scared of fish, Jennifer who had the confidence of Ichabod Crane (not the Johnny Depp version), Shane, well Shane was pretty good, and Kelsey who was perfect in every way.  Then you have all three of the final pair – Lisa the poster child for lithium, Adam who cannot cook, and the winner Aaron who was never was really bad but at the same time never was really good either.  There were also some new things this year – Bob wrote a blog, Susie kept a vlog, and Adam Roberts (no relation to Kevin) found something to dish about.

I bet this is way more than Bobby bargained for when he agreed to MC this year.

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5 Comments

  • 1. Carl Dee  |  July 27, 2008 at 11:19 pm

    Any fool could see they “broke all the rules” for Aaron. I knew at the end of Episode 8 that Aaron would be the winner. It was so obvious. Season Four wasn’t a true competition and the show is no longer entertaining. I hope there won’t be a Season Five.

  • 2. Waylando  |  July 28, 2008 at 1:36 am

    What The F***! Liza obviously brought more to the table that either adam or Aaron. At least Adam was interesting – isn’t it interesting that this summer, 2 cooking shows touting “bold flavors” and “a big attitude,” (Down home w/ the Neelys, Sunny Anderson) also featuring black hosts, were launched (and subsequently pulled from cooking and used as hosts on tv shows about food). When NFNS was taped, the producers probably thought that was the way to go. Does anyone on the Food Network actually cook anymore?

  • 3. ron  |  July 28, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    Food Network,
    Your affirmative action is showing!!!

  • 4. Ansh  |  July 29, 2008 at 9:45 am

    Between the three finalists It should have been Lisa who should have won. she was stylish, she knew her food and she could cook. I felt they were all biased. They did not like the fact that she was different from the rest of the crowd.

    Aaron could cook, but he did not know most of his ingredients. he gave no hint of knowing what he was doing.

    All In all I am content watching “good eats” with Alton and that is all food network has to offer to me 🙂

  • 5. periphery  |  July 31, 2008 at 9:52 am

    Team Adam here. Adam was the most TV-friendly of the bunch. The camera just loved him. He may not have been the best cook out of all the contestants, but he had the best balance to be a TV host.


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Stuart Reb Donald

Stuart is a celebrity chef and award winning food writer. Donald performs live cooking demonstrations and penned the cookbook Amigeauxs - Mexican/Creole Fusion Cuisine. He hosts two Internet cooking shows "Everyday Gourmet" and "Little Grill Big Flavor."

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